Are you tired of being tired? I was. In order to harness the energy required to tend to my amazing life and engage lovingly and consistently with my husband, I invited space for grace to enter. From this S.P.A.C.E. of Soft, Positive, Active, Clear Energy, I entered a state of grace, of calm abiding. Here, I found I am more approachable, more supple. I softened my gaze. I hugged my beloved until I more fully relaxed, experienced comfort in my own skin, and came home to myself.
Remember daily practices
Here’s what I do: Regularly drink water and stay hydrated. Deeply breathe into my heart center. Fully exhale what is no longer needed in this moment. Willingly inhale the sweetness of this moment, right here, right now. Then, my friend, when I do these things, I’m stepping into Command Central of my nervous system. My relationship with myself thrives, and so does my marriage.
Imago training to reclaim my lost self
During a training in Imago Relational Theory, I had the great good fortune of experiencing a jewel of British Columbia, the amazing metropolis of Vancouver. Here I continued the journey of healing my relationship with myself and learned essential practices to enhance my relational health coaching practice.
Per my mentor’s request, I entered the world of my lost self. Thinking about my childhood and what messages I got, I remembered how I was not encouraged to do sports, to be strong, to be successful. I wasn’t told not to, I just wasn’t encouraged to. So I entered the space for grace, dressed up as Serena Williams, and reclaimed my lost self of a strong athletic and driven woman who can succeed beyond measure.
This was many moons ago. Now I am paddling, running, spinning and going to Chisel class at the gym twice a week. My daily practice of yoga, meditation, and writing are more consistent than ever. I am both soft and strong. Strong back, soft front. Both structurally sound and vulnerable. Both, and.
As far as success, it waits for me across the street. I hear it, clearly, chirping in a language I understand, GO NOW.
As my dear friend Molly would say, I’m a bad-ass mama. I am reclaiming my wholeness.
Here’s a poem I wrote while in B.C., with a few modern edits. Please enjoy. Invite space for grace to enter; now.
unburden my heart
unburden my heart as i embark on adventure
prepare to discover myself anew
how do i want to sound, look, feel, interact
with all that is around me
big trees towering
fresh beauty flowering
the humming of commuters
entering the tunnel after a long awaited pause
a birth canal to a new self
Self, now whole
reuniting parts forgotten
reclaiming parts of my lost self
willing to strengthen
willing to soften
move, sweat, write, pray
practicing a daily practice
i can do it
my senses alert
i see the tv across 13th street
no need to focus in there
i hear the chirp of the crosswalk saying, GO NOW
gently –in another language–
i smell the coffee in the corner shop
since the poetic thoughts while driving have evaporated
trust the process of condensation and precipitation
the cycle of water is steady
open my heartmind to it now
long time manifest
this calm abiding
a result of inviting space for grace
to enter into my heart
and work in a way
that is indeed,
therefore, no longer am i
i am claiming it all