sober creative nurturance

  1. it’s important to go fallow sometimes
    to be in the pause
    to rest and recalibrate to a new way of being

    recent months of becoming crone
    the elder in the household
    one of the wise ones riding menopausal waves
  2. do you know your ideal mothering traits?
    mine include patience, nudging to take risks, silence-breaking
    i’ve learned how to give myself these…

    as a child there were powerful creative women drowning in alcohol
    unable to set boundaries, to speak for what they needed
    to follow their heart’s desire

    running in the woods, swimming in the lake, dreaming with clouds
    these pockets of joy in an atmosphere of divorce, drinking and chronic doing
    cigarettes and cigars the playmates of my parents

    they provided what they could, coated in layers of fear
    i wanted to be able to make a mess, to be creative, to care less
    but i was told to be tidy, to clean up after others, to be safe

  3. i was afraid
    i was locked up inside
    dwelling in an overactive mind

    excelling at academics
    earning scholarships and praise all-the-while
    drinking alcoholically & seeding depression

    my maternal grandmother drank to death
    her liver failed her due to scarring and cirrhosis
    she died on mother’s day when i was 14

    i found recovery from my own disease 
    of drinking alcoholically
    nearly a decade later

    it runs in the family roots, my, mom, too
    danced dangerously with drink
    sober or not, i know not which, she died alone
  4. today i reflect
    on the gifts of being 
    a sober creative woman of integrity

    mothering two amazing children
    loving a hubby who just lost his parents
    bearing witness to the hardest year of his life

    menopause brings me closer to truth
    direct connect with the Divine
    Mother Earth guides me and is nudging me 

5. i’m writing more
i’m pausing more, painting more, paddling more
i’m offering more time in serving my clients

revive and reveal
our true nature

live an extraordinary life

no matter your past, trauma can thaw
love yourself as your own nurturing creative mother
and enjoy relational health with Self, Other, Spirit

sending you virtual hugs and creative blessings

Amy Elizabeth (a good enough mother)

Amy Elizabeth Gordon, M.A.
Survivor & Thriver & Giver & Receiver
call/email for a nudge for greater relational health

passionately guiding couples and families
Serving Hawai’i Island and beyond
in-person or on-line

2-6 day retreats available now
5 openings through July

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